Thursday, March 24, 2005
My Heart
My faith is, absolutely, the most important thing in my life. But my family is God’s gift to me, here on earth. It’s because of them that I strive to be the best I can possibly be. Since my childhood was lacking in so many ways, I want to provide them with everything that I never had as a child. I’m not talking about material things, but spiritual and moral guidance. I want them to see the Heavenly Father through the actions of their earthly father.
Leaving them at home tonight, while I came to work, hurt more than I can ever remember. If there were I a time in life that I could preserve, it would be right now. In a few years they will be grown and I know I’ll long to have them back home with their mother and me. We’ve told each of them that we would give them a piece of property next to our home so they could and build, and live there with their families. While it sounds like a wonderful idea, I know it will never happen.
A couple of years ago I sat down and wrote a letter to each of them. I remember I had pretty much the same feelings about them that I'm having now. I don't think you can tell your kids you love them too many times. I figured since I'm here at work thinking about them, I'd might as well write it down. While it may not make for interesting reading (as opposed to what normally write), there is nothing easier than writing about these wonderful gifts from God.
Jordan,
When you were born you changed our lives forever. You fit the part of a big brother perfectly. You’re sisters are lucky to have someone as caring as yourself for their brother. Two weeks ago we celebrated your 13th birthday. It’s hard to believe that you’re actually a teenager now. Honestly, I thought that we would have had some problems out of you by now. But you’ve been the perfect child to this point. You’ve always managed to bring home A’s on your report cards, despite never having homework. Not one time have you been in trouble at school. In fact, teachers tell us what a great kid you are, that there is something special about you. You have given me many proud moments in your young life. One is when Coach Barker told me that his daughter Allison said that everyone at school was mean to her except Jordan. Another time was when your baseball coach told you to lie to the umpire and you wouldn’t do it. You stood up and did what was right. Three years ago, at camp, you allowed me to pray with you when you accepted Jesus. If I were to guess what you might be when you grow up, I’d have to say a politician. You have a knack of making everyone love you, yet you never stop being yourself. You are truly my best friend. I can’t imagine a day when you’re not going to be living at home. I love you, son. You’re everything that I wish I could have been.
Macie,
You’ve become a beautiful young woman. I don’t know if I’m ready for the all boys that are going to be knocking on our front door. You’re the most tenderhearted child I’ve ever known, yet tough as nails. You strive so hard to please everyone. I would have to say that you are the perfect textbook child. I’ve heard that dogs were good judges of character. That must be true because Woody sure is partial to you. You’ve always had a great deal of adversity to deal with in your life. But you keep your emotions bottled up inside. I remember telling you when your friend Ashley had died in an automobile accident. You didn’t shed a tear through the whole ordeal. Yet you’ll break down crying when you’ve forgotten to bring a your homework home from school. I know that it’s just your way of letting out the emotions that you have stored up inside. Even though you run from your mother and I when we try to give you a kiss, we know that you love us. I wish you weren’t so hard to get close to, honey. I remember when you were the best player on your t-ball team. And you were the only girl! Then, you were picked up by a team to go to the playoffs, that didn’t have any girls either, and you were their best player too. When you play basketball you’re always the best player on the court. You say you want to be a schoolteacher when you grow up. I think you’ll be a great teacher. I think your athletic ability will carry you to college, where you can study to be anything you want to be. Don’t worry, you’re definitely not a ‘girly girl’. I love you, Mae Mae. I’ll always be waiting for you to give me a big hug.
McKenzie,
You are the stereotypical ‘baby’ of the family, and you know it. You’ve learned to use your cuteness and those big blue eyes to get anything that you want. And it works! You’ve got so much potential to be many different things. Your ability to be a ‘drama queen’, combined with your beauty, could take you far as an actress. At first I didn’t like the idea of you being a ‘cheerleader’. But having watched what you can do, I think you’re a great at it. You may not like playing softball or basketball, but I’ve never seen anybody who can tumble like you can. You may be a member of the 2012 olympic team. I love the fact that you’re able to talk to me about stuff. I know that you’ve been having questions about death, God, and salvation. I think it’s great that you’re starting to wonder about these things. You know that your daddy is always here for you to talk to when you’re ready. For some reason, I think you’ll be the one kid who builds their home right next to ours. Who knows, maybe you will never move out. You know that would be alright with your mommy and me. I love you, sweetheart.
Passion Week: Thursday
On this day, He had His disciples prepare the Passover lamb (Matt. 26:17-19; Mark 14:12-16; Luke 22:7-13), and Jesus and His disciples had their Passover meal in the Upper Room (Matt. 26:20-30; Mark 14:17-26; Luke 22:14-30; John 13:1—John 14:31). Leaving the Upper Room, Jesus had a discourse with His disciples and offered an intercessory prayer in behalf of them (Matt. 26:30-35; Mark 14:26-31; Luke 22:31-39; John 15:1—John 18:1). They arrived at the Garden of Gethsemane, and it is here where Jesus suffered in agony (Matt. 26:36-46; Mark 14:32-42; Luke 22:39-46; John 18:1). Later that night Jesus was betrayed and arrested (Matt. 26:47-56; Mark 14:43-52; Luke 22:47-53; John 18:2-12). During the rest of that night, Jesus was tried first by Anna’s and later by Caiaphas with the religious leaders (Matt. 26:57-75; Mark 14:53-72; Luke 22:54-65; John 18:13-27).
Leaving them at home tonight, while I came to work, hurt more than I can ever remember. If there were I a time in life that I could preserve, it would be right now. In a few years they will be grown and I know I’ll long to have them back home with their mother and me. We’ve told each of them that we would give them a piece of property next to our home so they could and build, and live there with their families. While it sounds like a wonderful idea, I know it will never happen.
A couple of years ago I sat down and wrote a letter to each of them. I remember I had pretty much the same feelings about them that I'm having now. I don't think you can tell your kids you love them too many times. I figured since I'm here at work thinking about them, I'd might as well write it down. While it may not make for interesting reading (as opposed to what normally write), there is nothing easier than writing about these wonderful gifts from God.
Jordan,
When you were born you changed our lives forever. You fit the part of a big brother perfectly. You’re sisters are lucky to have someone as caring as yourself for their brother. Two weeks ago we celebrated your 13th birthday. It’s hard to believe that you’re actually a teenager now. Honestly, I thought that we would have had some problems out of you by now. But you’ve been the perfect child to this point. You’ve always managed to bring home A’s on your report cards, despite never having homework. Not one time have you been in trouble at school. In fact, teachers tell us what a great kid you are, that there is something special about you. You have given me many proud moments in your young life. One is when Coach Barker told me that his daughter Allison said that everyone at school was mean to her except Jordan. Another time was when your baseball coach told you to lie to the umpire and you wouldn’t do it. You stood up and did what was right. Three years ago, at camp, you allowed me to pray with you when you accepted Jesus. If I were to guess what you might be when you grow up, I’d have to say a politician. You have a knack of making everyone love you, yet you never stop being yourself. You are truly my best friend. I can’t imagine a day when you’re not going to be living at home. I love you, son. You’re everything that I wish I could have been.
Macie,
You’ve become a beautiful young woman. I don’t know if I’m ready for the all boys that are going to be knocking on our front door. You’re the most tenderhearted child I’ve ever known, yet tough as nails. You strive so hard to please everyone. I would have to say that you are the perfect textbook child. I’ve heard that dogs were good judges of character. That must be true because Woody sure is partial to you. You’ve always had a great deal of adversity to deal with in your life. But you keep your emotions bottled up inside. I remember telling you when your friend Ashley had died in an automobile accident. You didn’t shed a tear through the whole ordeal. Yet you’ll break down crying when you’ve forgotten to bring a your homework home from school. I know that it’s just your way of letting out the emotions that you have stored up inside. Even though you run from your mother and I when we try to give you a kiss, we know that you love us. I wish you weren’t so hard to get close to, honey. I remember when you were the best player on your t-ball team. And you were the only girl! Then, you were picked up by a team to go to the playoffs, that didn’t have any girls either, and you were their best player too. When you play basketball you’re always the best player on the court. You say you want to be a schoolteacher when you grow up. I think you’ll be a great teacher. I think your athletic ability will carry you to college, where you can study to be anything you want to be. Don’t worry, you’re definitely not a ‘girly girl’. I love you, Mae Mae. I’ll always be waiting for you to give me a big hug.
McKenzie,
You are the stereotypical ‘baby’ of the family, and you know it. You’ve learned to use your cuteness and those big blue eyes to get anything that you want. And it works! You’ve got so much potential to be many different things. Your ability to be a ‘drama queen’, combined with your beauty, could take you far as an actress. At first I didn’t like the idea of you being a ‘cheerleader’. But having watched what you can do, I think you’re a great at it. You may not like playing softball or basketball, but I’ve never seen anybody who can tumble like you can. You may be a member of the 2012 olympic team. I love the fact that you’re able to talk to me about stuff. I know that you’ve been having questions about death, God, and salvation. I think it’s great that you’re starting to wonder about these things. You know that your daddy is always here for you to talk to when you’re ready. For some reason, I think you’ll be the one kid who builds their home right next to ours. Who knows, maybe you will never move out. You know that would be alright with your mommy and me. I love you, sweetheart.
Passion Week: Thursday
On this day, He had His disciples prepare the Passover lamb (Matt. 26:17-19; Mark 14:12-16; Luke 22:7-13), and Jesus and His disciples had their Passover meal in the Upper Room (Matt. 26:20-30; Mark 14:17-26; Luke 22:14-30; John 13:1—John 14:31). Leaving the Upper Room, Jesus had a discourse with His disciples and offered an intercessory prayer in behalf of them (Matt. 26:30-35; Mark 14:26-31; Luke 22:31-39; John 15:1—John 18:1). They arrived at the Garden of Gethsemane, and it is here where Jesus suffered in agony (Matt. 26:36-46; Mark 14:32-42; Luke 22:39-46; John 18:1). Later that night Jesus was betrayed and arrested (Matt. 26:47-56; Mark 14:43-52; Luke 22:47-53; John 18:2-12). During the rest of that night, Jesus was tried first by Anna’s and later by Caiaphas with the religious leaders (Matt. 26:57-75; Mark 14:53-72; Luke 22:54-65; John 18:13-27).
